Warmth

River Palmer

Farther than any perceivable concept, farther than windswept forests, vast oceans and imperceivable skies. Above all things physical, the planets, stars, the whole cosmos; all things interstellar and unimaginable. Beyond everything, is emotion. In purest form, without a doubt the greatest conceptual boundary that people can perceive is emotion. Most of the time the expression of emotions isn't enough, to attempt to convey feelings greater than understanding is an impossible feat. It feels like whole respective worlds are inside of me, unfitting of description, and unwilling to get out. Nothing I can do can make it feel like this emotion is described. I'm unsure if it's the same with everyone but I'm sure I haven't begun to scratch the surface on how to describe feelings. Feelings so large and seemingly internally important to the universe as a whole. It's entirely difficult to even perceive such emotions, it's like trying to imagine everything that has ever existed all at once. I see it in everything though, cold rain, when the fingers of trees sway deeply in a breeze, crashing of ocean currents against rock, the moon bright and opaque causing the night to turn blue and ethereal. Everything is a reminder of this emotion, rain especially. Something about the solemn beauty of water falling from the sky, cascading shards of gorgeous glass that kiss your skin. There's an envelopment of love within rain, surrounded on all sides by water gifted from the heavens; water that trickles down soil and gives life to plants and animals throughout the ecosystem. It's something beautiful beyond understanding.
Although, ahead of these natural and raw phenomena, there is one evocation of this emotion that is greater than anything. Throughout all natural warmth, all things that live freely within the ecosystem, trees, deer, rain, the entire cycle of life and death in one great sphere, one thing connects it all. The entire beauty of the planet, every living creature working together to sustain the art of living. The entire universe working unanimously as one gravitational entity. All concepts of entropy and time, all bliss in the concept of perceiving. Nothing, none of it makes me the way that one single person does. One person makes me feel more at home than any of the gorgeous qualities of earth. Warmth in the ground, the sun's warm grace, warmth shared between two bodies, it's all connected in that way. I don't call it love, not really. I know that it's greater than that. The comfort shared between two people wrapped in each other's arms. The unimaginable feeling of infinity, seeing the entire planet in their eyes. It's all connected. Love shared between people and the love of the universe working together, stars sharing light, gravity, people sharing kindness, kinship. There's something between everything, something that holds everything together, and it's the same unexplainable feeling. The bliss gained from physical touch. Total overwhelming happiness in waking up next to them. I have never felt more comfortable than in the presence of one person, I have never really felt anything close to anything I feel around them. I found a home in their company, and I'm so lucky to have done that. I'm so lucky to have found an emotion greater than any other. Every song I listen to, every book I read, every landscape I could paint, nothing comes close. No matter how long I stand in the rain nothing makes me feel more connected to it all than in the presence of one other. It's not a coincidence, the truth of everything lies in this feeling. Greater than the universe itself this is what ties our reality together. Love in any form.

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